Humour · Kids · Uncategorized

Most Annoying Kids’ TV Characters of All Time

Back in 2011, I wrote this post for Listography over at Kate Takes 5 and it’s been one of my most popular posts of all time. Of course, Sausage moved past the age where she watched the shows mentioned in that post and onto stuff that we actually love as a whole family (such as Regular Show, The Amazing World of Gumball, Adventure Time etc.) so we aren’t bombarded with Dora the fecking Explorer (bit of pop trivia: did you know, her name is Dora because the Spanish for explorer is ‘exploradora’?!) quite as much any more but there are still several childrens’ TV characters who set my teeth on edge at the mere mention of their name, so I thought I’d share a few in case you agree:

Norman Price from Fireman Sam

Norman Price, Public MenaceNorman Price (or Norman the Knobhead, as he’s known in our house) is the most wilfully stupid, genuinely dangerous child I’ve ever seen on TV and I’m of the opinion that he should be locked up immediately for the safety of himself and the whole village of Pontypandy. It doesn’t matter how many fires/floods/landslides the annoying brat causes, he still does the same thing all over again and I’m getting to the point where I think Fireman Sam should just leave him to drown or be buried up to his neck in rocks rather than waste precious time and resources on saving the little twerp.

Mr. Lopart from Handy Manny

Mr. Lopart

Do you know what I think it is about Mr. Lopart that I hate so much? The sheer hubris of the man. Everything he EVER does is a disaster which requires him to be saved in some way by poor, overworked Manuel, yet he’s STILL arrogant enough to think that he can do things by himself. The man is a Darwin Award waiting to happen. I really hope Handy Manny’s patience runs out one day and he just sits in a lawn chair, sipping a rum and coke while Mr. Lopart gets carried off like Icarus into the sun on a giant bunch of sweet-shaped balloons.

Egbert from Poppy Cat

Egbert, Poppy Cat

Even aside from the fact that Egbert sounds like he’s got permanently impacted sinuses, the antisocial shitbag blindly turns down any invitation to go on adventures with a self-importance and rudeness which would make even my super tolerant, gentle-hearted mother-in-law swear. If I asked someone to do something every single day and was told “No, I’ve got something FAR more important to do…”, I think I’d end up punching them. In fact, more fool Poppy Cat for continuing to ask him along on her adventures. I hope she loses her shit one day and makes him into badger stew.

The Wise Old Elf

The (Not So) Wise Old Elf

I love a bit of Ben and Holly.

Err, I mean THE KIDS love a bit of Ben and Holly…

Anyway, the so-called “Wise” Old Elf is always claiming to be an expert at something which he then completely fudges and has to defer to the, frankly awesome, Nanny Plum to help him out with the magic that he’s spent the whole episode looking down his nose at. So, my question is this: Who decided he was so ‘wise’? Is it a name given to him by other elves? Because I see no real evidence of any sort of deep wisdom which warrants such a moniker, and if it’s a self-styled title then that makes him an arrogant dick.

So, come on, who gets on your nerves? Leave me a comment below!

12 thoughts on “Most Annoying Kids’ TV Characters of All Time

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  2. We refer to Norman Price as “Norman ASBO Price”
    Makka Pakka scares me with those dark circles round his eyes and his compulsion to collect stones and wash people, seriously think he’s a bit of a psychopath, I reckon Igle Pigle will arrive at the night garden one day and find that Makka Pakka has been on a killing spree.

    Love Ben n Holly too, inc the wise old elf, love the dynamic between him and the awesome Nanny Plum who I reckon could give Gandalf and Dumbledore a run for their money. Also for the older ones, and much better than Regular Show etc- Phineas. And Ferb- brilliant!

  3. Postman Pat! Especially in the new fangled Special Delivery Service. Has there ever been a more inept delivery person? He messes it up every single day! And is then lauded as a hero when he rushes in with his package just in the nick of time and saves the day. Hurrah for Pat! Ffs.

  4. Granny bloody Murray on Me Too. How and whose Granny actually is she? Bye bye honey pie – I just want to smack her inane grin and her ridiculous pearls of wisdom.
    I also cannot stand that strange noise that comes out Mr Tumbles mouth. Annoying red nosed bastard!

  5. Mike the Knight – he never listens to anyone, and it take him the whole episode to realise what people are trying to tell him! Then after that he promptly forgets what he has learnt and does something similar in the next episode. I stopped watching it with my little one as it wash;t teaching my daughter the correct way of doing things, it actually did the opposite and taught her how to ignore my requests!!

    Also, I cannot stand that pink swine (can’t say Peppa Pig out loud as she will want to watch it!), as the show does not teach my daughter anything worth while!

  6. I hate Peppa Pig, quite frankly the child is a horrible brat!! Lol
    The wise old elf is the biggest imbecile going, beaten only by Mr Tumble (never wanted to punch a children’s character more than him)
    Other characters I hate are Dora, swiper (from Dora), sponge bob square pants, all the smurfs & Cubby (Jake and the neverland pirates)
    I do love Curious George though and Nanny Plum, she’s hilarious.

  7. I noticed all the kids in Postman Pat’s village had ginger hair. Pat was sticking a lot more than just envelopes through the letterboxes, if you ask me…

    Luckily my kids have long outgrown CBeebies – they hail from the time of Balamory. And my older kids, the Teletubbies. Balamory had the screeching, hatchet-faced Edie Fecking McCreedy and the original Josie Jump, frankly looked a bit brutal and scary – like the PE teacher in ‘Kes’. Or a drill sergeant. I quite liked the camp policeman and the gay bloke in the castle but the rest of the town were shits.

    I think it is normal to grow to loathe kids’ TV characters and I have zero nostalgia for anything my kids ever watched (and my oldest is now 25). That Night Garden crap freak the crap out of me. So glad my kids are now playing video nasties. So much more civilized.

  8. 1) Peppa sodding Pig. And Daddy Pig.
    2) I’m with you on Norman. Remedial child.
    3) Everyone who ever lived in/visited Balamory
    4) Mr Tumble. Oh god no.
    5) I can’t think of any others since we only stream stuff, so don’t really watch TV in the traditional sense. But there is bound to be some other feckless idiotic character that gets on my nerves.

    *screams* *tears out hair*

    I do love a bit of Ben and Holly though. Hilarious. And definitely not really for children.

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